I often check one of my favorite websites daily; The Pioneer Woman.com. She posts new blogs or updates every few days on topics including her life on a ranch, photography, cooking, home and garden, and homeschooling. She is a homeschooling mother of 4, and although I'm quite sure I would never homeschool, some of the articles written are otherwise convincing. A new article posted today I find particularly interesting. It's about using the word TEACH as an acronym. Training, encouraging, assisting, creating, and honoring your children.
As I've been going through speech therapy with Caleb, I've found myself questioning 'the experts' sometimes. Are these standards we place on our children true and necessary? Or is every child different and unique? I understand there are "milestones" kids should be around at certain ages, but to me, I only get stressed out when I think about my child not hitting every single step in the correct time period. Here's a couple paragraphs from the blog;
"I cannot make my children learn when they are not yet ready to learn, but I can certainly assist them as they move along the path. Please understand I am not promoting laziness, but just because my children’s time-table doesn’t always match up with mine, or any national standard for that matter, does NOT mean they are being lazy. Sometimes it simply means they aren’t ready.
The amazing lesson I learned along the way is that when they are ready, if I have trained them (provided instruction), encouraged them (inspired courage and confidence), and am available to assist them (give support or aid), the day will come when they will leap over whatever hurdle that has held them up to date."
Sometimes as a parent, we're bombarded with so much information that we become impatient and worried about so many things. I know patience is not my strong suit, but in the case of children, and in particular, my Caleb, it's essential. Maybe if you have a few mintues you can read the whole article for yourself. Let me know what you think. Here's the link:
http://thepioneerwoman.com/homeschooling/
"Children have to be educated, but they have also to be left to educate themselves."
Monday, April 25, 2011
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Who knew?
Who knew it was so hard to be 2 years old? Oh, the drama. Oh, the heartbreak. Oh, the sadness when you have to do things you don't want to do. These days, I seem to be a terribly mean, awful mom. I mean, making my little boy hold my hand while we cross a parking lot? Oh, the thought! Giving him grapes instead of chips? Oh my! Sometimes I have a hard time not finding it humorous. I must admit though, I have a feeling that this whole next year will be filled with drama, screaming, and resistance. I mean, his independence has only just begun, right?
Who knew you didn't have to brush your teeth or eat your vegetables? Who knew that you could use a spoon without help, or not put your toys away when asked? The solution to all of these independence issues seems to be crying, screaming, and perhaps falling on the floor in a stiff lump of little boy.
These are trying times. For me, and for Caleb. I'm well aware this is only the beginning of my control fading away, and independent thinking taking over. I'm glad I'll have control of another life soon....at least for a couple years. :)
"The fundamental job of a toddler is to rule the universe."
Who knew you didn't have to brush your teeth or eat your vegetables? Who knew that you could use a spoon without help, or not put your toys away when asked? The solution to all of these independence issues seems to be crying, screaming, and perhaps falling on the floor in a stiff lump of little boy.
These are trying times. For me, and for Caleb. I'm well aware this is only the beginning of my control fading away, and independent thinking taking over. I'm glad I'll have control of another life soon....at least for a couple years. :)
"The fundamental job of a toddler is to rule the universe."
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Happy Mothering
Jeff got me two books for my birthday this year. One, was a biography of sorts by a favorite blogger of mine, The Pioneer Woman. The book, titled, 'Black Heels and Tractor Wheels' was a great read, and I found it to be comparable on some levels to my own life. I definetly recommend it if you're looking for truth, love, and laughter.
The other book he got me is titled, 'The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers'. This book is written by a pediatrician, who actually lives in northern Michigan. I've only read the first few chapters, but there were a couple profound things I read that I felt like sharing.
Lately, I've struggled a bit with figuring out if there is supposed to be more to my life than the title and role of mother. Sometimes I feel like I have lost a part of who I was, and am amazed at how mothering is an all-encompassing lifestyle. So, I thought this book would maybe bring some insight in to my life, as mothering is and will be my main role througout the rest of my life.
Here are a couple paragraphs that hit me hard:
"You are more precious than you know. I know this because in my twenty five years as a pediatrician, I have gotten a peak from behind your kids' eyes. I can see you as they see you. I have heard the excitement in their voices after you have praised them. I have seen your kids define you as their hero when you were in the other room. I have heard them cry over your hurt, laugh at your jokes, and pull their hair out because of your stubborness. I have literally read the value that you hold in your kids' lives, all over their faces and through their body language. When you walk in to a room, your son changes immediately. He relaxes because you are there and life feels safe again. If you recently scolded him, he scours your face to see if you're still mad, because he needs to know how you feel. You matter. Your mood changes his world a bit. If you're in a good mood, he can relax and play with his trucks. If you're upset with him, he wants to make up because you are the center of his small world. He needs you to like him again. You. No one else. Because once you are happy with him, he can go about his business and life will feel good again. He can focus at school, get his homework done, and pay attention during his basketball game. That is the power that you have and that power comes from the fact that in this one child's life - your child's life- who you are matters as much as life itself. You are loved."
Phew...pretty powerful food for thought. Here's another one:
"No mother can teach a child his or her own value if she doesn't first understand her own value as a mother. We are their teachers. We are the ones whom they admire and long to emulate. Our kids take the best of who we are (and unfortunately, sometimes the worst as well) and pull what they see inside of themselves. They take on our character qualities. They don't always take on the character qualities of teachers, coaches, nannies, or relatives, but they always take on ours. Therein lies just a part of our great value to them.
How can we assume that we little value when we give them life, shape their lives, and ultimately change their lives? We mothers are indispensable to our kids because no one can teach them how to love, empathize, nurture, or value others like we can. No one. And when it comes to teaching them how to love and value themselves, we are the ones with the greatest power to impart these profound and necessary truths to them."
So, in essence, after reading these two sections alone, along with more pages, I get the feeling that what the author is trying to convey is that being a mother is the most important job in the world. Part of being a happy mother is realizing your worth comes simply from being a mother. It sounds so simple, but it's hard to grasp at the same time. I think I'll just keep reading....
"The responsibilities of motherhood can seem overwhelming. It is important to remember that the Lord does not expect mothers to be perfect or to achieve an unrealistic ideal standard of homemaking. Yet He does expect them to recognize and honor their divine role and to humbly do their best."
The other book he got me is titled, 'The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers'. This book is written by a pediatrician, who actually lives in northern Michigan. I've only read the first few chapters, but there were a couple profound things I read that I felt like sharing.
Lately, I've struggled a bit with figuring out if there is supposed to be more to my life than the title and role of mother. Sometimes I feel like I have lost a part of who I was, and am amazed at how mothering is an all-encompassing lifestyle. So, I thought this book would maybe bring some insight in to my life, as mothering is and will be my main role througout the rest of my life.
Here are a couple paragraphs that hit me hard:
"You are more precious than you know. I know this because in my twenty five years as a pediatrician, I have gotten a peak from behind your kids' eyes. I can see you as they see you. I have heard the excitement in their voices after you have praised them. I have seen your kids define you as their hero when you were in the other room. I have heard them cry over your hurt, laugh at your jokes, and pull their hair out because of your stubborness. I have literally read the value that you hold in your kids' lives, all over their faces and through their body language. When you walk in to a room, your son changes immediately. He relaxes because you are there and life feels safe again. If you recently scolded him, he scours your face to see if you're still mad, because he needs to know how you feel. You matter. Your mood changes his world a bit. If you're in a good mood, he can relax and play with his trucks. If you're upset with him, he wants to make up because you are the center of his small world. He needs you to like him again. You. No one else. Because once you are happy with him, he can go about his business and life will feel good again. He can focus at school, get his homework done, and pay attention during his basketball game. That is the power that you have and that power comes from the fact that in this one child's life - your child's life- who you are matters as much as life itself. You are loved."
Phew...pretty powerful food for thought. Here's another one:
"No mother can teach a child his or her own value if she doesn't first understand her own value as a mother. We are their teachers. We are the ones whom they admire and long to emulate. Our kids take the best of who we are (and unfortunately, sometimes the worst as well) and pull what they see inside of themselves. They take on our character qualities. They don't always take on the character qualities of teachers, coaches, nannies, or relatives, but they always take on ours. Therein lies just a part of our great value to them.
How can we assume that we little value when we give them life, shape their lives, and ultimately change their lives? We mothers are indispensable to our kids because no one can teach them how to love, empathize, nurture, or value others like we can. No one. And when it comes to teaching them how to love and value themselves, we are the ones with the greatest power to impart these profound and necessary truths to them."
So, in essence, after reading these two sections alone, along with more pages, I get the feeling that what the author is trying to convey is that being a mother is the most important job in the world. Part of being a happy mother is realizing your worth comes simply from being a mother. It sounds so simple, but it's hard to grasp at the same time. I think I'll just keep reading....
"The responsibilities of motherhood can seem overwhelming. It is important to remember that the Lord does not expect mothers to be perfect or to achieve an unrealistic ideal standard of homemaking. Yet He does expect them to recognize and honor their divine role and to humbly do their best."
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