I am Dutch

Well, the title of this entry is just the plain and simple truth. I am Dutch in all ways possible I'm afraid. Well, at least as far as finances are concerned. I suppose I'm not so bad that I won't splurge now and then, but I find as the holidays roll around I really realize how Dutch I am. First, let me just ask, is that statement even real? If you are 'Dutch' does that mean you are a cheapskate? Well, I really am of Dutch heritage, but, I must admit, I'm also sort of a cheapskate. One of the signs of this disorder is that I have buyers remorse. Sometimes after a purchase is made, I think to myself, "Oh, I could have found this for a better deal." Or, "I better just return this, I don't really need it."

Today I finished my Christmas shopping. Although I enjoy getting gifts for others, I also find myself feeling a slight level of panic. I don't really know why either. It's not like we are so poor that we can't pay our heating or lighting bills. In fact, we are very blessed. I think I just have this programming in my brain that subtracts each purchase automatically.

Jeff often tells me that I can't take money to the grave. This is a very true statement. In some ways, I wish I was more easy-going about financial decisions. I'm not really sure what exactly I'm saving for. Ok, that's a lie....but it's not something that I desperately need. Maybe I just like knowing that I have a little extra change to fall back. Stability, if you will. I will justify my 'Dutchness' by saying that living on one income is difficult. So, you might say, 'go out and work then!'. True, I could, but I'd rather be Dutch and pinch my pennies, than miss out on watching my baby grow.

As Christmas swiftly approaches, I hope to remind myself that I have all I need. Maybe as a New Year's resolution I will try to be less Dutch. Or not.

"You're not much if you're not Dutch."