One of those days

We all have them. You know. One of those days. The kind where you wake up on the wrong side of the bed (in my case after lacking a full night's sleep for going on 6 weeks), and the world and everyone in it is bad. You just feel ornery, emotional, grumpy, or ungrateful. Well, yesterday I pretty much felt all of those things. My lack of sleep, seemingly constant days filled with crying/whining, feeding children, changing poopy diapers, and looking at my flabby stomach caught up to me. Good thing no one really saw me yesterday...except for my dear husband, who sometimes must take the brunt of my moods. Ok, he is a little to blame. It just isn't fair that he gets to enjoy his hobby (hunting) while I tend to my never-ending job! But, after a decent night's sleep and a sunny day, I feel better.

Last night before I drifted off to sleep for a few hours, I decided to look back in a book Jeff gave me for my birthday. I have referred to it in past posts, and probably will again, but when I read the book I folded over specific pages that spoke directly to me. I thought maybe reading through a few of those folded-over pages would help clear my head. That it did.
Two things struck me particularly last night:

1. Love is much easier to give and receive when we don't let it get too messy. So often we (uhhh...I) overanalyze our kids', husband's and our own behaviors. We mothers make everything personal. We have expectations for our kids' behaviors, our husband's behaviors, and ourselves. When they all fall short, rather than stepping back, we get angry. I really need to work on letting go of those expectations. Even if you don't realize you have them, it's a good idea to step back and realize that expectations and love don't go together very well.

2. Focus on the big stuff and let the small stuff go. Wow, I really need to work on that sometimes! We create barriers for ourselves if we constantly allow ourselves to critize our spouse and kids. Complaining does no good...although it might make me feel a little better at the time. Dismissing character flaws, attitudes, and temper tantrums, and focusing on the good will help us appreciate loved ones even more.

This is all nice and good, and something to aspire too. Yet, it's very difficult when you're caught up in day to day life. Most nights I say a little prayer, asking God for patience, kindness, and courage. I think I need those things the most these days.

"Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn't know you had, and dealing with fears you didn't know existed."